Top Ten Signs Charlie Sheen is a Triathlete
#10: The last race you entered had divisions of Age Group, Clydesdale, Masters, and WARLOCK.
#9: Two goddesses were spotted as sherpas at the Malibu Triathlon
#8: In the participant list for Ironman Florida, it says: Charlie Sheen, M, Age: 45, Hometown: Mars, Occupation: Bitching Rock Star.
#7: Cervelo is making a one speed, one gear bike called P2.5 CS
#6: Oh, and said Cervelo comes with new battle tested bayonet forks.
#5: Oh, and with a new Speedfill goggle that lets you drink through your eyes.
#4: He does underwear runs every day, before his first cup of coffee.
#3:The distance for the Ironman was changed to swim 2 feet, bike 30 yards, and walk 10 yards because Charlie Sheen closed his eyes and made it so.
#2: Tiger blood is now on the list of banned substances.
#1: He qualified for Kona because he is always winning. DUH.